Finding Balance

Finding balance in our busy lives seems to be something we have all strived for or at least thought about at one time or another. Family, work, hobbies, friends, spirituality, down time, fitness, and many more. How do we allocate enough time to each to feel balanced and whole? That constant feeling that there are not enough hours in the day. The regret of not being productive enough by the time you lay down to sleep. The wheels spin and you are already thinking about what you should do tomorrow when tomorrow hasn't quite come yet. 

It is stressful feeling unbalanced! Something else I have learned, is that it is even more stressful to stress about balance! It's like an oxymoron. It's as if actively working at balance causes you to lose your balance and fall. You are pulling yourself in so many directions that there is no time to relax. And with no relaxation, there is no balance!

I think we try too hard. The hustle for balance throws everything off! We try so hard to have it, and try to show everyone we have it, that we don't see that we really don't have shit at all.

Just in the past week of not scrolling Facebook everyday has made me feel more balanced. I felt overstimulated in a sense. Reading about and seeing what everyone else was doing and feeling several times a day became exhausting. It was too much unnecessary information. I found that without it, I just did what I did and felt what I felt, peacefully, and I still am. 

You have your vacations to relax and get away. You have your stay-cations to relax and "stay" away. Then there is the Facebook-cation, to relax and get back to YOU.

I don't think we can ever stay fully balanced for long. It has to be an ever changing process. You have to be open, as life is constantly changing. I can say that the most balanced I have felt is recently. It has been the warm sun on my skin after feeling lost in a cold fog.

What changed? What brought the sun out? I quit worrying about it. I quit trying so hard, I quit thinking I had to do more. I did what felt right and what I enjoyed. 

I refrained from doing things out of obligatory feelings. I quit attending social events that I didn't absolutely feel like attending. I stayed home and relaxed if that is what felt needed. I stopped thinking that I had to explain myself all the time. I'm learning to just be. Just be. It sounds simple, but I'm realizing more and more that some people don't just be. They "do" and share, and play the part, and stress. 

I like being. It's the most comfortable place I've been in a while. The best part about just being, is not feeling the pressure to please others. I have inadvertently run that role to the ground and I don't ever care to pick it back up. It comes naturally to some of us, so it takes effort. It's all part of the balance though! When pleasing someone also pleases yourself, it feels balanced, so please away! When you are pleasing just to avoid not pleasing, stop it.

It's a work in progress and I'm smack in the middle of it. Be patient with yourself. 

So work and play, rest and workout, socialize and stay home for movie marathons, handle responsibilities and do nothing. Do it all, in your own time and how YOU choose. If you feel rushed and stressed, take something off of your plate, life will go on without so many "things" to do and places to be. Don't worry about what everyone else is doing, just be. It's calm and nurturing and you will like it there, I promise.