After seven years of being home with the kids I am returning back to work full time. I trust the universe in it's plan as everything came about with the grace of perfect timing, the right company and position, my hip is good to go, and everything fell into place in regards to the kids, the where, what, and whens are all tied up.
I am so grateful for the factors that allowed me to stay home while my kids were young. Logan was three when I stopped working outside the home and Dominique and Andrew have had me home since the beginning. I have gone through my emotions about missing the kids, although I am sure it will creep up again. I have had many thoughtful days about being at peace with losing the free time I acquired when Andrew started preschool. I am thankful for the quality alone time I have had to reflect and grow, and write, especially this last year when it meant the most to me. I am grateful for the years I had to make friends and be a part of a wonderful group of women who changed what a SAHM meant to me and what true sisterhood is all about.
There is a certain change that has been sticking in my mind the last few days. Relationships are going to change. I will not have my coffee dates or breakfast with my girlfriends, we will have to form new ways of keeping up with one another. I won't have summer break full of lazy days at home and exhausting outings. I won't be home with dinner ready when my husband walks through the door, or all the times he is hoping dinner is ready and instead I haven't even thought of dinner yet because my brain is so fried from the kids arguing and spilling stuff. I have a feeling I have let my mind wander to a particular topic a tad too much...
My yoga pants.
The relationship between myself and my yoga pants is going to take on a whole new life. Now when I say yoga pants, I usually am referring to any kind of work out pants. I am a huge fan of my form fitting Capri-length workout pants, but yoga pants have a special comfort all their own. Wearing them is like eating a bowl of mashed potatoes, hopefully you are doing yoga in them and not eating a bowl of mashed potatoes, but I'm talking about the comfort they bring. You know damn well a bowl of taters brings you comfort, let's be real here. They are soft and stretchy, and easy. They are typically black and slimming (I tell myself this anyway so don't you dare spoil it for me).
Let me just reminisce about my history with yoga pants. I remember my first pair. It was in 2006. It was just me and my toddler. I wore them only while taking walks or my days off that were spent at home. We did not have a strong bond. I did respect them and all the comfort they had to offer, but our relationship was casual.
Fast forward about five years. At this point it is now myself, my husband, my five children, a couple of dogs, and my yoga pants. Our relationship had become intense, to the point of me feeling the need to own three pair. I only owned three pair because on one income, I didn't feel comfortable buying more. If I did, I would have had like, seven pair.
First it was all comfort and love. I loved how soft and easy they were. They were dependable. I respected them and they got me through the day. After a while though, things got messy. It became a co-dependent relationship. Most people that know me, know that I cringe at co-dependency. Only because by nature I am deeply independent (or I organically became this way at some point in life). I remember feeling a little bitter when one pair got a hole, as if it ripped its own seem just to piss me off. A friend once surprised me with a pair of yoga pants as a gift. I can remember the day like it was yesterday. They are my favorite pair to this day. There were times the husband would make comments about the yoga pants, as if he wish I would put on some jeans or making them sound negative in some form. He obviously noticed how close we had become. I was not about to let my husband's comments come between us, he knew nothing of the bond we shared. How dare he, he doesn't even wear yoga pants, how would he know!
I know that some people complain about people that wear work out clothes while not working out. I get it, but being at home with kids is kind of like working out. Not like heart racing, calorie burning working out, but you get messy. It is the type of 'job' that requires comfort and ease of movement. For me, I was almost constantly moving. I was either actually doing yoga or working out, I was cleaning, I was running errands, I was picking up dog shit, I was cleaning up little boy pee, I was wiping up spills, I was making lunch, I was meal prepping, I was picking up and dropping off at multiple schools. I was doing so much laundry on a regular basis that I didn't want to waste my "good clothes" on doing all this busy work and adding to my laundry. There were days no one really saw me besides my kids and whomever was at the preschool. I wasn't showing up in pajama pants so can it!
So here we are, myself and my favorite pair of yoga pants. I've been getting in some lovely, comfort-filled days with them this last week. Next week I will reunite with my old flame, Business Casual. It's been a long time. I have to say I am pretty excited about getting back together. We shared some stylish times and I look forward to more. I know that my yoga pants will be faithfully waiting for me. I plan on early morning yoga and of course any lazy weekend that arises. A healthy break will do us some good. I know you can't always move backwards, but I think its worth a try to get back to the casual life we used to have together. Change comes with change.
I probably would have become just as attached to my yoga pant material booty shorts, if it weren't inappropriate to leave them house wearing them. Sometimes society's pull is a good thing.
So here's to change, in many forms. Lifestyle. Motherhood. Relationships. Yoga pants.
